My son is 15 years old, turning 16. He has always been an easy-going, easily adaptable, pleasant child. The last two weeks I noticed, especially on weekends, that he seems a little agitated. When I questioned him, he said that he is feeling frustrated and just feels like breaking something or just putting his fist through something. He said that he is feeling angry, but does not know why. I regularly clean his room and have not found anything unusual amongst his things that could indicate drugs or cults. It concerns me that he is so agitated. He says he has difficulty sleeping. Have you got some advice?
Advice: There are many reasons why your son could be angry. Boys and men tend to turn their feelings of hurt, sadness, frustration and fear into anger. I would encourage you to get him to counseling if this continues since he has a serious problem with anger.
You haven’t found any drugs but you should still be concerned about substance abuse. Whenever someone’s attitude and behavior has such a radical change, drugs and alcohol may be the culprit. Many times when people are angry, they are dealing with depression as well.
If there have been any recent changes or losses in your son’s life, that may also be the reason for his anger. Changes are frustrating and cause irritability. Loss brings up many emotions that need to be worked through.
I would urge you consider purchasing the book, What’s Good About Anger? When you go to the website by the authors, have your son take the inventory. It might help him, and you, learn the cause of his anger.
Also, there are some frequently asked questions about anger. So, consider going to counseling and encourage your son to work through his anger by reading a book about learning new skills to cope with anger.
This article was written by: Lynette Hoy, NCC, LCPCPhoto Credit: Jesús Rodríguez