I am 31 and the oldest of three girls. My sisters and I are all married with young children. My mother shows obvious favoritism to my middle sister and her 7 year old daughter. She spends tons of money on their family, travels to visit them frequently, talks with them on the phone daily, and babysits their children regularly. She has no time for my family or my youngest sister’s.

This has been going on for years and I wrote her a letter once explaining what I perceived and she told me and a counselor about it and it helped for awhile. I trust no one to love me because my mom doesn’t even love me. I have tried to talk to her about it, but my mom doesn’t communicate about heavy topics and there is too much inside of me to casually bring it up. I end up sobbing and yelling and she just walks away thinking I am nuts and too sensitive. I do not think she will ever change so I need to come to terms with this. What should I do?

Dear Struggling,

She will probably never change. Was she herself the middle child growing up? Do you live close to Mom? Can you move away and live a life separate from her and your other sister? Maybe have Christmas and Easter together. Pick up the book Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner and get back to us.

This article was written by: Issues I Face

Photo Credit: Brian Wolfe